Decide together first
Agree with your partner before talking to anyone. Then present the rules as protecting the baby, not as a personal reaction. Johns Hopkins says you do not owe anyone an explanation.
Common house rules
- Wash hands before touching baby. No kissing the baby. Sick people stay home.
- Visitors up to date on Tdap, flu and COVID vaccines, with shots at least 2 weeks before.
- Johns Hopkins suggests asking extended family and friends to wait 2 to 3 months. Others focus on hygiene and a healthy household; ask your pediatrician what fits.
- Visits of an hour or less. The birthing parent decides who holds the baby and when.
- No posting baby photos unless you say so, no unrequested advice, no changing how baby is fed or held.
Turn visitors into help
Food beats a baby gift. Ask for laundry, groceries, a dish train, or holding the baby while you shower.
Scripts you can borrow
- "We can't wait for you to meet them. We'll let you know when we're ready for visitors."
- "Please skip the kiss and wash up first. It's a pediatrician thing."
- "We'd love your help. Could you bring dinner and run the dishwasher while you're here?"
- "Thank you for the advice. We're following our pediatrician on this one."
For grandparents (share this with them)
Follow the parents' lead and ask before visiting, gifting or helping. Learn current guidance on safe sleep, car seats and feeding. Defer on how baby is fed, put to sleep and held, even if you did it differently.
Not feeling okay? Reach out now.
Education, not medical advice. Every baby and every parent is different. Ask your own doctor, midwife or pediatrician about anything specific to you, and call them or emergency services if you are worried. Sources for this guide: Johns Hopkins Medicine: newborns and visitors; Babylist: grandparents and new babies; One Year Box. All sources.